This song…

Gotta go my own way is a song from HSM 2.. i was actually thinking whether to post this song or the one from the first HSM which is “When there was me and you” but  i think this should come first… I can actually relate to this song.. the problem is, i dunno if i should sympathize with Gabriella or Troy..

 

Gabriella
I gotta say what’s on my mind
Something about us
doesn’t seem right these days
life keeps getting in the way
Whenever we try somehow the plan
is always rearranged

It’s so hard to say
But I’ve gotta do what’s best for me
You’ll be ok…

I’ve got to move on and be who I am
I just don’t belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place
in this world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way

Don’t wanna leave it all behind
But I get my hopes up
and I watch them fall everytime
Another colour turns to grey
and it’s just too hard to watch it all
slowly fade away

I’m leaving today ’cause I’ve
gotta do what’s best for me
you’ll be ok…

I’ve got to move on and be who I am
I just don’t belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place in this
world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way

Troy
What about us?
What about everything we’ve been through?

Gabriella
What about trust?

Troy
you know I never wanted to hurt you

Gabriella
and what about me?

Troy
What am I supposed to do?

Gabriella
I gotta leave but I’ll miss you

Troy
I’ll miss you

Gabriella
so
I’ve got to move on and be who I am

Troy
Why do you have to go?

Gabriella
I just don’t belong here
I hope you understand

Troy:
I’m trying to understand

Gabriella
We might find our place in this
world someday
but at least for now

Troy
I want you to stay

Gabriella
I wanna go my own way
I’ve got to move on and be who I am

Troy
What about us?

Gabriella
I just don’t belong here
I hope you understand

Troy
I’m trying to understand

Gabriella
We might find our place in this
world someday
but at least for now
I gotta go my own way
I gotta go my own way
I gotta go my own way

 

Cooling off

i’m confused… i don’t know… i don’t want it to end.. but i can’t be selfish…

Removals

I’m taking the removals on my last subject before internship… i’m not scared of the exam, i’m scared of how the people around me are reacting… It’s my first time taking a removals and I have no idea what it feels like…

 

I wanted to take the removals.. I needed a reason to study and review all my notes.. I need something to scare me… And this is it… So far, I’m not scared of it yet.. Maybe I’ll feel it when it’s only a day away..

 

I wished for it and i got it.. I like it..

 

Is it bad?

Uncertainty

I am uncertain about a lot of stuffs. But even though I am, I still do not want to assume anything. Right now, I feel a little stressed. I ask a lot of questions. What if this happens? I know what to do but how about the others?

 

In the end, what matters most is my own decision.

What do you do when you’re happy?

smile

Ask me anything

Things I’ll Never Say

I’m tugging at my hair
I’m pulling at my clothes
I’m trying to keep my cool
I know it shows
I’m staring at my feet
My cheeks are turning red
I’m searching for the words inside my head

[Pre-Chorus]
(Cause) I’m feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know you’re worth it
You’re worth it
Yeah

[Chorus]
If I could say what I want to say
I’d say I wanna blow you… away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Guess, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say

It don’t do me any good
It’s just a waste of time
What use is it to you
What’s on my mind
If ain’t coming out
We’re not going anywhere
So why can’t I just tell you that I care

[Pre-Chorus]

[Chorus]

What’s wrong with my tongue
These words keep slipping away
I stutter, I stumble
Like I’ve got nothing to say

[Pre-Chorus]

Guess I’m wishing my life away with these things I’ll never say
If I could say what I want to say
I’d say I wanna blow you…away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say
These things I’ll never say

~*~

current mood: down and out of this world
current motto: Life is like a rosary, full of mysteries
current question: how to have fun without upsetting your important person?

i’m so sad….

February 17

aaahh… this is life… ^____^

 

but i miss my hon.. T__T

 

went to starbucks UN with ming and her friends from UST.. ^__^

Blogging to Reflection

Blogging… i do this when i feel like it.. i made a total of 5+ blogs in my entire lifetime and it almost always changes every 2 years if it exceeds the 6 months probation.. XD that’s because new blog sites keep popping up everywhere so i want to try out the site that suits me the best.. and so far, wordpress is ok for me.. ^_^

 

now, i have a course subject that requires me to reflect on the lab session and then post it on the blogsite the facilitators made in blogspot.. i don’t even know why i’m posting here now.. i must be really bored because the lab session lasted an hour and thirty minutes and most of what we did was film showing.. it was one of the most enjoyable laboratory sessions i’ve had because of the same reason.. i’m such a movie/book lover.. i sometimes wonder that if i can only give so much attention to my studies as i do my leisure, i would probably ace all of my exams.. ahahahaha.. but of course i should think realistically as well.. i probably start enjoying the course if i’m not being graded.. for example, anatomy class.. knowing the human anatomy keeps me interested but then since i’m being graded, i want to take it all in immiediately, meaning i feel the need to memorize word for word.. but then examination comes and i get a mental block.. so instead of memorizing it, i think understanding how it goes is much more important.. of course i only realized that when i saw my final grade in anatomy.. but now i try to go back and read my notes and i find it more interesting now!

 

i dunno why my brain works like this.. see.. i’m ranting now.. this has turned to a realization entry.. i do wish i can write a good reflection for my 138 class.. i need to step it up.. XD

Mini-sembreak

January 26-27… no classes… wahahaha!!! i’m so happy… but then again, i still had lots of things to accomplish like the trans for upcoming exams as well as EBP group meetings… sabaw!! hahaha…

 

Google Documents!!! it’s soooo cool!!!! sugoi!!! ^______^ our group had fun using this application!! hooray for google!! hahaha.. and because of that, i remembered that i had a gmail account named “heavendenied” for my previous blog… they kept teasing how emo it sounded.. but hey! that was way back in 2007! i was emotionally unstable… XDD wahahaha…

 

this mini sembreak would end in a few hours but i would spend it studying for tomorrow’s treatment planning class… >__< sadness… oh well… back to work!! ^_^

When you wish upon a star…

… you don’t always get what you want

I’ve learned that the hard way.

I found my attraction towards the medical course way back in 3rd grade. Eversince, i never stopped talking about becoming a doctor at the age of 26. I thought all it took was passion and perseverance. But as i grew older, financial matters bothered me. I’ve been dreaming of entering la salle med when i was in highschool but eversince i got into UP manila for my pre-med, i thought “it’s waaay cheaper here!”. But of course i know my chances are veeeery slim and so i looked for scholarships instead. Unfortunately most of them need you to have latin honors which i don’t think i’ll be getting. Then early this morning, one of my friends told me that St. Luke’s is offering a scholership that is soooo tempting!! But the glitch is, i need a 2.0 GWA. As of now, my GWA would be somewhere near 2.3. Is it near? I don’t think so. It’s really hard to get a high grade in my major subjects. This would be the last sem with lectures for i only have internship next year. But if i do great this sem, there still is a chance for me to obtain that scholarship.

*sigh* the grade is just a part of this depression… All i can say is that there are things in life that can’t be given to us…’it’s a sad thought but i guess we just have to wait and see…